Through my thoughts
by bluefrogs88
Summary: My take on the thoughts of my fav. characters during episodes. Will always post warnings for spoilers at top of each chapter. May go AU at some point...
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hello all, I had this plot bunny running around in my head so much since I saw last week's episode and just had to write it down. Please feel free to let me know what you think...No major plot here, just what I imagined Emmett would be thinking during the scenes between him and Bay. MAJOR spoilers for episode 'Expulsion From the Garden of Eden.'...please don't read if you are bothered by that sort of thing. **

**Bold and italics are signed only. Spoken and signed is just regular. Italics is thoughts.**

**Yeah, the words that you recognize are from the show...not from me... Enjoy. =)**

Carrying these heavy ass boxes wasn't much fun. At least I was enjoying the view. Watching Bay's ass as she walked was as pleasant a way to pass the time as any.

All in all, I was in a great mood. Leaving mom's house was the best thing I'd done in awhile and I was super excited to get my new life going here at my dad's. Dad remembered what it was like being a sixteen year old boy. He didn't feel the need to make up any bull shit rules for me to follow. He knew that I was growing up and becoming my own man.

Bounding up the stairs, I could barely restrain my smile. Bay didn't share my good mood if the look in her eyes was any indication. She began talking to me, something about walking so far. Then she caught sight of her reflection in the window and began frantically trying to straighten her hair.

There was no need. She was absolutely gorgeous! I was rather partial to seeing her all hot and sweaty. Made me think of how she'd look after we had sex. _Mind out of the gutter, Emmett!_ I decided to do the good boyfriend thing and reassure her.

_**You don't have to be nervous. Just be yourself.**_

"Yeah. Because that worked out so well with your mom!"

_Touche! _I knew nothing I could say would top that so I just shrugged and opened the door. Might as well get this over with.

Dad saw us coming and headed my way, his arms open wide. We hugged. I couldn't believe how much I'd missed him!

After a brief check, to be sure I was okay, his curious gaze wandered to Bay. He had suspicions about who she was, of course. I'd talked of little else since I'd met her.

Stepping back, I introduced them. _**Dad, this is Bay.**_

She immediately started into her polite greeting of how nice it was to meet him, but dad being dad totally ignored all that and gave her a big hug. My smile grew. My dad was so accepting.

_**I am so glad to FINALLY meet you! **_He gave her face one last squeeze before stepping back and addressing me. _**You weren't kidding when you said how gorgeous she is.**_

I felt my face turn red. Last thing I needed was for my dad to out smooth me here. _**Dad...come on.**_ Bay's signing was really good now and I really didn't want him blabbing about how much I shared.

Thankfully he let it drop, asking where the rest of my stuff was.

I explained how we'd had to park so far away.

Bay chose that moment to jump in. "Yeah, we would've parked closer, but some idiot decided their small penis car was too good for one space!"

My eyes nearly bugged out of my head. _She did NOT just say that!_

Dad simply smiled, asking if it was the blue convertible.

"Yeah. That's the one."

His eyes twinkled as he laughingly talked about how he'd been meaning to talk to the owner about their bad parking.

Olivia, his live in girlfriend joined us at that time and he pointed at her. _**And here she is now.**_

I watched all the blood drain from Bay's face as she realized exactly who she'd been insulting. She turned to me, her lovely eyes filled with horror. _**That was her car?**_

I was still stuck on the penis comment._ Seriously! You just met the man and you're talking about penises with him?_ I wasn't even aware that she knew that sign. We hadn't gotten to body parts yet. _Wonder where she learned it from? And what other personal signs she knows..._

Dad and Olivia were laughing by now. He quickly introduced her to Bay, who tried to laugh off her previous comment. Saying how it was really no big deal.

Olivia wasn't in the least offended. She just made some remark about knowing what a terrible parker she was.

Bay, still in suck up mode, reverted back to the extreme politeness. "It's really nice to meet you."

I was pleased when Olivia began praising Bay for how well her signing was. I was quite proud of her myself. No one had ever made such an effort to be able to communicate with me before and it was beyond flattering. I hated how my mom always made her feel bad about her signing abilities. She could never quite grasp that this was a whole new language for the teen.

Bay's face lit up at the compliment. "Thank you!"

They kept conversing, with Olivia explaining about her being hard of hearing. Dad and I shared looks of mutual joy. Women were funny creatures and often times, were very possessive of their territories. It was a relief to see our girlfriends getting along so well.

Then I saw why dad wasn't phased by Bay's earlier comment. Apparently his girlfriend had a loose tongue when she was nervous, too. "...amongst other things..." There was no missing what she meant by that.

Bay and I shared a look. We hadn't talked about that yet, so it was a bit awkward for us. Still, we all shared a laugh before picking our boxes back up. Bay took hers to a corner of the living room while I carried mine down the hall. Dad and Olivia went with me, chatting away about how sweet and beautiful Bay was. My smile felt like it took up my entire face. Moving in here was going to be the best thing ever!

-page break-

A few days, and several trips, later we'd managed to get everything from Mom's house moved to Dad's. Bay had been a big help and I knew it hadn't been easy on her. Mom blamed Bay for everything, but especially this. She'd spent the past week following me around and fussing every chance she got. She was sure that I was only doing this because of 'that girl' as she called her. I wished I knew how to make her understand it was her attitude and refusal to accept that I was growing and changing that led to this. That and I missed my dad. Don't get me wrong, I loved my mom, but dad and I had always been very close and, as a young man, I really felt the need to be around another man. He understood things like privacy in the bathroom and with my girl.

Tapping her on the shoulder, I went to the wall over my headboard. _**There's this website that turns**_ _**photos into wallpaper. Wouldn't it be cool if the entire wall was this.**_..I held up my favorite picture of the two of us. One of the first ones I'd taken. We were on my bike and she was peering over my shoulder, arms wrapped around me. Every time I saw this picture I smiled, remembering the crazy feelings she'd stirred up inside of me. The ones I'd tried so hard to ignore. Having had a crush on Daphne for most of my life, it was hard for me to accept that I was interested in some-one else. Especially since that some one was a Kennish. Part of the family that was involved in turning my world upside down.

It was no good ignoring those feelings, however. The more I was around Bay, the more I liked her. She was smart,funny,pretty, sexy, passionate, independent, fierce yet gentle. And hurt. There was so much hurt in her. I'd felt so sorry for her. Daphne was so well loved by Regina, who was doing everything she could to make sure the girls knew she chose Daphne over Bay. And it seemed like everyone else was going out of their way to make the poor little deaf girl feel comfortable and welcome in her new life. Bay had somehow gotten lost in the shuffle. Her sarcasm and belligerent attitude fooled most people into thinking she was tough and didn't care about anything. I, however, knew better. I could see below the surface. See the real Bay. The one shaking in fear and rage at how out of control her life was. The one who longed desperately to find a place where she belonged. A place to just be.

My mind had wandered, and for once it wasn't to the gutter. But I was brought back by Bay shaking her head at me. "No. Then my pores would be the size of hubcaps."

_She was so adorable._ _**I'll photo-shop it.**_

"So you think my pores need to be photo-shopped."

_Uh oh! _My mind screamed at me that this was a trap and I needed to get out now.

_**I'm not going to win this, am I?**_

"No." She giggled, making her tits bounce a bit.

Okay. At least she's honest. I moved on to my next idea. _**What about a giant Axe Girl? **_

I loved her art. And I wanted her to know it. I was fiercely proud of her talent.

But, apparently, she didn't like that idea either. "That is NOT a good idea. It's illegal street art. I'm trying to remain undercover here."

_More like trying to never get me in trouble again._ I knew she hadn't gotten over my being arrested, or how poorly I took it. Things had been rough between us for a few days. Bay's guilt over her part in it never did go away.

I made a joke about them staking out my room to catch her,but she didn't seem to appreciate it much. Merely countered with her next argument.

"I don't think that will send the best message to your dad about your girlfriend."

_Well, shit._ I knew how sensitive she was and how much it bothered her that Mom didn't like her. She wasn't going to do ANYTHING to risk Dad having those same feelings. I dropped it.

Being Bay, she couldn't stay down for long though. If I was going to be funny about things, she was going to be right there with me. "Ooh, you know what? Maybe we'll just do a big blow up of YOUR mug shot!"

I pretended to like the idea, causing her to blow up a bit herself. "No! We're not doing that!"

I didn't want to tell her my favorite idea. A picture of her. Preferably less dressed. Now THAT would be a great idea for the wall by my bed. Not like I didn't stare at her picture as I rubbed one out at night anyways. Might as well make it official.

Olivia came into the room, interrupting us. I turned to see her holding one of Bay's paintings. "I like it! The colors are bright but the lines are...angry!"

I had to laugh. That was so my girl. _**That's Bay. Bright and angry. **_

Furthering the flattery, she asked Bay if she could buy the piece, pending that I wasn't planning on hanging it up anywhere. Which I was. That was one of my favorites.

Still, Bay just gave it to her.

_OK..I guess I'm not going to hang it up_. I couldn't be mad though. I truly appreciated how much Olivia liked Bay and how welcome she made her feel. Besides, it'd still be somewhere in the house so I could look at it. Maybe that would open up another wall for me to put more pictures of her...hmm.

Olivia started to leave, only to stop at the door and turn back. "Are you staying for dinner?"

"No. I've gotta get home."

"Oh. Well, you're welcome anytime. And feel free to stay here, if you'd like. It's totally cool."

I barely resisted looking at Bay. I was elated at the thought of her staying here...at my house...with me. Elated and a bit aroused.

"I mean, beds are more comfortable than the back seat."

Subtlety was NOT her strong suit. Mumbling something about having to go, she finally left the room.

I had to walk away myself. But not before giving Bay a small smirk. We hadn't talked about sex much. The opening just never seemed to present itself. I knew I was ready but I wasn't sure where Bay stood on the whole thing. One thing was for sure ; living here, it WAS going to come up. Probably sooner rather than later. I couldn't wait!

-page break-

We were on our way home. Bay was driving once again. I missed my motorcycle more than ever. I knew she didn't mind, but something about having to have my girlfriend drive me to and from school made me seriously perturbed.

I was careful not to take it out on her, though. She was doing me a favor and I still got to enjoy spending time with her. I missed her arms wrapped around my waist. And the feeling of her breasts poking into my back. Plus side; I could spend my time staring at her, rather than the road.

Passing by a large billboard advertising self portraits reminded me there was something I needed to tell her. It'd have to wait though. I refused to try and converse with her while she drove. She had to watch me too closely and I didn't think her driving skills were up to the task. No sense risking an accident when all I had to do is wait till we stop somewhere.

Arriving in front of my house, I smiled as she cut the engine. _**Hey.**_ I caught her attention before she climbed out. _**Okay, I have to warn you. Olivia is going to hit you up to do a painting of her.**_

She didn't say anything. Just sat staring at me like I'd lost my mind.

_**I think it's a present for my dad**_. I explained, hoping that would make it better.

She cringed.

_Okay, apparently that didn't help._

"It's not a nude, is it?"

Now it was my turn to cringe. I hadn't given it that much thought._** It's Olivia. You got a 50-50 shot.**_

"Is that weird? I just met her."

_**I just met her!**_ How do I explain this to her? _**One day you find our your parents are getting a divorce...the next day your dad's introducing you to his new girlfriend. **_Okay, so I hadn't realized just how very BITTER I was about that. To be fair, I had to add the good side of things. _**But she makes him**_ _**happy. And she REALLY likes you.**_

That last bit was the most important to me. Sadly enough. After the fiasco of introducing Bay to my mom, I don't know what I would've done if dad and Olivia had felt the same. I didn't have the means to be on my own yet. And I couldn't lose her.

Bay was hesitating. I wondered what was going on in that pretty head of hers.

"She thinks that we're sleeping together."

_I wish_! I knew I had to tread lightly here. I didn't want to pressure her into anything, but still...sex with Bay..my mind boggled and I felt my dick start to swell. At the very least I now had a chance to find out where Bay stands on the idea.

_**Would that be so bad?**_

"I...I-"

_Is she blushing? And stammering? My God, it wasn't that hard of a question!_

"I...wouldn't ...know."

_Oh, she wouldn't-wait...what! _A suspicion began to form in my mind. _**Are you**_...

"Yes! I'm a virgin!"

While I knew what she was saying, I couldn't help but laugh as she got the sign wrong. Seeing her confused glare, I quickly got myself back together. Copying the sign she'd just made, I explained that it meant 'vegetable'...Then I showed her the sign she should've used.

Thankfully she found the slip funny, too. "So what are you? A vegetable?" she asked between giggles.

_Shit! I guess now's as good a time as any._

Sobering up a bit, I shook my head 'no'. _Please be okay with that. Please be okay with that!_ I panicked a bit but forced my face to stay blank. _Let's see how she feels about it before I give anything away. _

Bay looked as shocked as I'd felt upon hearing she was still a virgin. "Oh...One of the other food groups."

I could practically see the question forming in her mind and was all prepared when she finally asked.

"Did you do it with..."

_**No!NO!No**_! I hastily cut her off. I knew she wasn't going to let it go, so I quickly added, _**I don't peel **__**and tell.**_

Okay, lame, but hopefully effective as a distraction.

I explained that it was a vegetable joke, to which she replied, "yeah, I got it."

It went back to an awkward silence. I patted her leg.

_**Does it bother you that I'm not a 'vegetable'?**_ I used her word for it, hoping to make her smile.

It sort of worked.

"No!"

_Liar!_

"Yes. No! I don't know! Is it weird that I am?"

My mind immediately began to shout it's offer to help her with any unwanted virginity. But, seeing the naked insecurity on her face, I once again did the good boyfriend thing and simply waved her off. _**Of course not!**_

I thought about telling her how happy it made me to know that she wasn't experienced. I had thought for sure that she'd been with at least Ty. I was big enough to admit that the thought of her being with anyone else made me extremely jealous. She was mine!

We talked a few minutes more before I forced myself to get out of the car. Seeing as my dad wasn't home, she couldn't come in. Stupid parents and their stupid rules. Her parents rules, anyway. My dad honestly wouldn't have cared if she came in. He was with Olivia and believed we were already being intimate with each other. _Soon. Hopefully VERY soon! _

I knew I had the biggest smile on my face as we shared one last kiss and she drove away. I couldn't help it. I was thrilled to have this conversation over with and out of the way. Granted she wasn't bursting at the seems to get in my bed, but she hadn't seemed completely opposed to the idea either. At least I knew she was thinking about it. My hormones were all hyped up, excited at the continued growth in our relationship.

-page break-

Kissing Bay was most definitely one of my favorite things to do. She had come over to work on homework with me. No sooner had she closed her last book than I had her in my arms and we began kissing. Her mouth was passionate against mine; her hands clinging to my neck, staying in the safety zone. My own hands were a bit bolder, wandering lower and lower as I worked up the courage to grab her ass.

Before I reached there, she rubbed her finger against my ear and pulled back. Holding up said appendage, she asked what it was.

It took me a moment to swap gears, having to shake out the lovely fantasies filling my brain, I managed to realize she was asking about the slick black residue, transferred from my ear to her finger.

_**It's grease. **_I mouthed carefully, knowing this sign was new to her. _**I was at the salvage yard all day**_ _**looking for a motorcycle frame**_.

She looked worried. "Uh, you skipped school? Does your dad know?"

_Ha! And mom thought Bay was a bad influence on me! _In this case, I was happy to report that I'd done nothing wrong.

_**Who do you think wrote me the note? We're building it together!**_ I had to admit, I was stoked to be doing another project with my dad. He knew how much it hurt me to sell Ripley. I hadn't seen him so angry in a long while when he learned that mom made me sell it. He insisted that he would've given me the money. _Oh well. Too late now._

"Wow!" Bay seemed impressed. "Can your dad write me a note to get me out of all of second semester?"

I smiled and mouthed a 'sure', but my mind was elsewhere as I leaned back in, ready to get back to our kissing. It wasn't to be though. Not three seconds later, she was pulling back once more. I tried not to get frustrated. I knew she didn't mean anything by it. I was just horny.

I must not have done a great job of hiding it, though, because she felt the need to explain.

"Before I forget, and you're SUCH a good kisser that it's a very real possibility, J and K invited Angelo for a family dinner."

_Okay, that's actually kind of funny!_

_**Can I watch on pay per view?**_

She laughed. "There's no need. There's a ring side seat, just for you. It's tonight!"

_I love that we have such a similar sense of humor! Wait...did she say tonight? Crap!_

_**I can't. My dad and I are going to hunt for an engine.**_

I hated the look of disappointment on her face. I also knew it was very likely she'd need to talk things out and have some moral support if this dinner went anything like her family dinners usually go.

_**You want to come here after the dinner?**_

"It might be kinda late."

_Even better!_

Remembering that we were sitting fairly close, I tried to keep myself calm. Didn't want to scare her off. _**You heard Olivia. It's okay if you want to stay over.**_

She didn't miss the unspoken invitation.

"You mean, STAY OVER, stay over?"

I couldn't stop my eyes from wandering down her body or my lips from curling into a smirk. _Hell_ _yeah!_

_**If you want to**_...Not wanting to have her doubt what I wanted, I quickly added, _**I mean, I want you to**_.

My body practically buzzed with nervous excitement as I waited for her answer. _Please say yes!_ _Please say yes!_

She thought about it a second before giving a nervous smile. "Me too...I'll-I'll come over as soon as I can."

Okay, not as enthusiastic as I'd hoped, but still, she answered yes. I mouthed a quick 'great!' and just smiled at her, rubbing her arm softly, hoping to comfort her. I was dying to kiss her again but that didn't seem like such a good idea at the moment. She seemed too nervous. Even if we don't go all the way tonight, this is definitely a step in the right direction! Feeling my dick try to jump out of my pants I made a mental note to take a shower as soon as she left. If I go into tonight already feeling this anxious I'll embarrass myself in record time! NOT the impression I am hoping to leave her with.

Discreetly adjusting myself, I prayed fervently for time to pass quickly. She hadn't even left yet and I already couldn't wait for her to come back.

-page break-

This afternoon was probably the longest in my life.

After Bay left, I hopped in the shower to relieve a bit of tension. Then dad and I headed straight to the salvage yard, hoping to find a functioning motorcycle engine. I enjoyed the time with my dad. It meant a lot to me that he was willing to help me build another one, but for some reason, I just couldn't seem to focus.

Dad noticed, of course. He was patient with me, though, and our bonding time was wonderful.

It was barely dusk when I suggested we head home. Dad shot me a funny look. _**I thought maybe we could grab a bite to eat and hang out. Olivia's working late, so it's just the two of us.**_

_**Actually, I'd like to just head home, if it's okay with you. Bay's planning on coming over after her family dinner.**_

_**Ah.**_ He smiled. _**I understand. Okay, let's get going.**_

After another relaxing shower, I checked my bedside table. Good, my condoms were still in date. One less worry. Now all I can do is wait.

Distracting myself wasn't easy, but I managed. Dad and I were watching TV. when the lights flashed. Half a second later I was at the door. _**Hey!**_

My welcoming smile quickly faltered as I saw the tears in her eyes. _**You okay?**_ I grabbed her hand and led her into the house.

By this time dad was standing, staring at us. _**Everything okay? **_He truly liked Bay and just like me, he couldn't stand the sight of her upset and hurting.

She didn't answer him, simply continued wiping at her cheeks.

Wrapping an arm around her shoulder, I gestured that we were going to go talk in my room. Dad simply nodded. His worried gaze following us down the hall.

Once we reached the safety of my bedroom, Bay's silence ended. She began talking faster than she could sign but I was able to keep up enough to realize most of what was going on. _Angelo was a felon._ My blood ran cold at those words. _A wanted fugitive_. And he'd been spending alone time with my girlfriend. My blood boiled because I knew how much this hurt her. _Sick fucking bastard! What kind of dad would put his daughter in a position like that? Hide a felon or turn her own father in..._

I sat on my bed, reclining back slightly, and pulled her down with me, simply letting her talk and tell her story.

She calmed somewhat, explaining the cock and bullshit story Angelo had fed them. At least, I thought it was bull. Bay seemed to believe him. _Why does she have such a blind spot when it comes to this guy?_

Then she mentioned her parents threat to call and have him deported. _I'm all for that idea! Get that_ _bastard as far away from her as we can!_

She became agitated. Too much to remain lying down, so she hopped up and began to pace, at least taking the time to sign now, helping me follow her. "They have no right to do this! They just don't like him!"

_**Well, there's a little more to it than that.**_

"Like what?"

_**It's assault and battery! **_As I mimicked a beating, I couldn't help but think what would've happened if Bay had somehow upset the man and his temper had been unleashed upon her. _**Your parents are**_ _**trying to protect you!**_ And so was I.

As much as I hated hurting her, I couldn't want her in danger. I agreed with John and Katherine.

"Who's side are you on?"

_What is it with girls asking me that? __**Yours! **_I was always on her side. Espcially the keep her safe side.

"Wow! My signing must be REALLY bad!"

_Uh oh, she's breaking out the sarcasm. Run!_

"Because it sounds like you're defending them!"

I sat up now, knowing I needed to get this point across. I made sure to sign as clearly as possible. _**Bay, he's a felon**_! Any logical person would accept the truth of that statement.

And clearly logic wasn't an option for her right now. "He's my dad!"

I must have upset her more then I thought because she proceeded to launch into an attack against everyone else. "And what about your dad? He has a bong the size of a space needle in there!"

Now I was getting pissed. Without thinking I found myself on my feet standing in front of her. _**yeah,**_ _**because that's the same thing.**_

"It's not the same thing!"

_Thank you!_

"Because at least my dad's not dating a chic who's half his age! Who incidentally has been trying to mate us like we're Giant Panda's."

I'm not sure if it was the reminder of sex, which I'd miraculously managed to forget about for the half a second I argued with her, or the realization that if she was attacking my family; people I knew she really, really liked, then she was simply lashing out. Looking for a fight to have an outlet for her hurt. Either way, somehow that managed to get through to me and I found myself calming.

_**I'm sorry. **_I held her arms, feeling the need to touch her in any small way. _**Let's not fight. **_The last thing I had been trying to do was further her upset. I wanted to be her place of comfort.

I'm not sure how, but what I said seemed to anger her even more. At least she didn't leave me guessing for long.

"Oh!" She flung my hands off her arms. "If you think there's any chance of us sleeping together tonight, then you are higher than your dad!"

Turning her back, she fled my room. I stood there a minute, fighting my frustration and disbelief. I knew that I should go after her and explain that she had misunderstood. My goal in saying that was not ONLY for getting her into bed. I truly hated fighting with her. But I also knew Bay well enough by now to realize that no matter what I said she was going to try and turn it around. Maybe the best thing I could do for now is to let her have her space. No matter how hard it was for me.

Flopping back onto my bed, I ran my hands over my face. This was NOT how I'd imagined this night to go. Dammit!

**A/N (2) ; Well, I'm going to mark this as a done one shot. The point of this story was to get down what I felt could've been his thoughts during the show. However, I am entertaining the idea of continuing it, making a short story where I go AU and just go with what I HOPE happens. Thoughts? **


	2. Chapter 2

**Gasp! I can actually post this part today! Quick! (sorry, this is me being sarcastic at b/c I've been trying to get this part up for the better part of the weekend!)**

**A/N: Okay, here's where I tell you that if you haven't seen last week's episode of SAB ,Las Dos Fridas: Then please be aware there are spoilers ahead..**

**Okay, for everyone else, let me just say that I was sooo not happy that there was NO Emmett in that episode! I really hope next week's has more of him. Also, I am having a hard time getting a feel for Bay's character without making her sound like a spoiled rotten brat! She is only 16 after all, and while her parents did much to redeem themselves, she wasn't present for the majority of it, therefore has no idea. Kindly keep that in mind.**

**-Nothing you recognize from the show is mine, this is just me playing with what I think said characters might be thinking at times during the show. **

Bay POV:

Anger. According to Webster dictionary, anger is a strong feeling of displeasure and usually of antagonism. _Whatever that means._

I just know that I am angry. Very angry. Here lately that emotion seemed to be the norm for me. _Why doesn't __anyone understand? _

Sitting on my bed, trying to psych myself up for the next few days, my thoughts ran to my boyfriend. I missed Emmett. I'd gotten big news from my school and I was dying to tell him. I didn't though. After the way we'd parted the other night, I was too afraid to. I had been unfair to him, I knew. I just couldn't bring myself to apologize for it. Not yet.

Didn't mean I didn't miss him, though. He was my biggest supporter and to have such a big honor bestowed upon me and not share it with him just felt wrong. I almost reached for my phone.

Mom came in the room, babbling about how she'd just been informed that I'd been selected to paint a mural. She seemed happy for me. I only answered with sarcasm. It was all I had. She wasn't the one I wanted to share this with. Besides, I was still angry with her. I was still angry with everyone.

A car honk interrupted her lame bonding attempt. _Saved by the bell...well, by the horn anyway._

"Grandma's here!"

-page break-

Grandma's visiting for this week. _Oh joy!_

My mom is absolutely terrified of her own mother. Grandma runs all over my parents and they just let her. I knew, too, that Grandma was going to have PLENTY to say about the swap. She has plenty to say about EVERYTHING.

Watching her fawn over Daphne wasn't pleasant, but I knew it was coming. I couldn't even begrudge her. Not much anyway. Mostly I was jealous of the fact that my real family didn't share the fascination and desire to know me, the way the Kennish's did for Daphne.

I got a really nice present though. Grandma always gave great presents. Staring at the cover of the book for Latin American art, I wanted to laugh. _Could she have given me anything more perfect!_

"Grandma, I got selected to pain a panel for Buckner's Wall of Honor."

She didn't acknowledge me. Her full focus was on Daphne, who had yet to open her gift. Dad congratulated me, while Toby made a wise crack that no-one but Dad found funny. Grandma didn't say anything. At least not to me. She was explaining to Daphne about the cameo in her hand. The one that had been promised to me.

_That's mine! _I immediately recognized the beautiful jewel. Growing up, Grandma had regaled me with tales of her own grandmother wearing the cameo, and how it was a family treasure. How each Grandma selected one of her Granddaughters to pass it on to. We all knew it would come to me someday. She didn't even have to choose. I was the only grand daughter.

_Not anymore I'm not! Daphne's here now. And they ALWAYS choose Daphne over you. _

I know I was pale. I wanted to scream and cry and rage at the whole lot of them for being a bunch of unfeeling hypocrites! But I didn't. I simply sat there, watching yet another area of my life fall apart.

-page break -

I couldn't sleep. I missed Emmett. I hated how we'd left things and I was feeling very insecure about our relationship at this point. Would he break up with me now that I didn't follow through on our plans to have sex? Was he angry with me? He hadn't tried to contact me. That wasn't a good sign.

I seemed to be making a career out of losing loved ones lately. Half of them ran screaming from me once they got the opportunity to have Daphne instead, and the other half, I shoved away with my anger and hateful words.

_This is stupid! Why am I lying here, wanting to talk to him? I just need to call him. The worse he can do is not answer. Or tell me that we're over. At least then I'll know._

My mind made up, I crept out of my room and headed for the kitchen where I'd left my phone earlier. As I got closer I heard voices. Apparently I wasn't the only one still awake at this hour.

Mom and Grandma were already in there. And they were talking. About me.

"-SHE is your daughter!"

"Bay's my daughter, too, mom!"  
><em>Wow! Was mom actually standing up to Grandma? <em>

She went on to defend me, bragging about my art and how quickly I was picking up signing. It wasn't hard to guess that Grandma had been talking about my intelligence, or lack there of. She'd often wondered aloud how my mom had been so smart and yet I wasn't. At least not in school matters.

I knew it was wrong to listen to them. I knew they didn't intend for me to hear this. I should stop. I just couldn't seem to make myself leave. _Is blood REALLY that important to her? Does Grandma not love me anymore?_

I got my answer. "I love Bay. And I always will. But I can't pretend that I don't see her differently now."

Those words cut me to the quick. I'd known. I'd known all along. They didn't love me as much as Daphne. They didn't want me. I wasn't "theirs". I was different.

Racing up the stairs to my room, I shut the door and fell face first onto my bed. Tears and sobs escaped, no matter how hard I tried to muffle them. I hated them...I hated them all...

- page break -

It took me awhile to get over my bout of self pity. And by awhile I mean, like, I'm still not over it. Okay, I can admit that I didn't HATE them, I was simply being dramatic, but I was hurt. And angry. Again.

The only thing that seemed to make me feel better was painting, so I threw myself into the mural. I was almost done, too. It was coming along beautifully. Things were going well. At least until Mom came in, scaring the crap out of me!

I was late for tea. _Big deal. Everyone would probably have more fun without me there, anyways. _I tried to get out of it. I was defiant, and rude, but for some-one who lets Grandma walk all over her, Mom certainly had no trouble sticking it to me. _That's because believe it or not, some of us still care about what our mothers think..._That's what she told me. Point blank, to my face. Did she really believe that? Didn't she see that I CARED? That's why I was so hurt, is because I CARED what my mother and grandmother thought about me.

Pouting, I did as ordered.

-page break-

Tea went about as I expected. Grandma spent all her time fawning over Daphne and sympathizing over how horrible it must have been for her, growing up Latina and all. To be fair, Daphne didn't play into it over much. She tried to point out the good things in her life. I wasn't in the mood to be fair though and my sarcastic nature once again came to the fore. It wasn't a minute later that I had Grandma snapping at me once again.

_Forget this! _I wasn't going to sit here and be insulted any longer. I heard her true thoughts last night. I didn't need to hear anymore.

I fled the restaurant, so upset I could barely think straight. Mom followed me. I admitted that I heard them talking last night. _Oops._

I knew she felt bad. Her face was an open book. Always had been. The suckiest part of all of this was that I couldn't even tell them how wrong they were.

"The thing is...Grandma's right."

"No. No, she's not."

"I'm not like her, mom! I'm not like you...I'm different!" _That's why all this started in the first place. Because I KNEW something wasn't right. I knew that I didn't belong here. Didn't belong with the Kennish family._

To my horror, tears flowed from my eyes and I heard myself begging to be left alone. _I hate crying! Especially in public! _

For once she respected my wishes, and I hurried off, sliding into the back seat of a nearby cab.

"Where to, little lady?" The driver looked at me in his rear view mirror.

_I want Emmett! _"Just take me home, please."

_Coward._

It wasn't a long drive, thankfully. By the time I reached my house, the tears had stopped and my anger had taken control. Without considering the consequences, I found myself in the garage, staring at my beautiful mural, a can of white paint in my hand. I threw some at the board. _That felt good! _

I did it again, and again. Watching with satisfaction as I ruined all my prior hard work.

I don't know how much time had passed before I came to and realized what I'd done. More tears welled in my eyes and I fought them back desperately. _Enough crying! I'm sick of crying!_

Time to get some answers. So I went to the only person I could think of at that moment. Regina.

- page break -

Knocking on that door was hard. Harder than I expected it to be.

"Hey."

"Hi."

_Why is she just standing there, staring at me? _"Can I come in?"

That seemed to snap her out of her trance. "Yeah." Opening the door wider, she let me in.

Walking by the mirror I couldn't help but cringe. _That's why she was staring at me so intently...I look awful! _Being covered in paint wasn't so bad, but the pale cheeks and red, swollen eyes didn't lie. She knew something was wrong.

Apparently Regina did have some mothering skills, even if she rarely used them on me, because as soon as I started to cry, again, she gave me the saddest, yet most understanding, smile.

"It's okay." Her voice was soft. Kind. "Come on. I'll make you a hot drink and we can talk."

Next thing I knew, I was sitting at the table with her, sipping the most delicious beverage I'd ever tasted in my life. and spilling my guts to her. Of all the people in my life, I knew she'd have one of the best chances of understanding how new and different this all was to me.

Regina makes sense to me. So many times my mom's comfort consists of her just wanting to deny facts and gloss over truths. It worked well when I was young, but now I knew better. Regina didn't do any of that. She said it like it was and she didn't flinch away from unpleasant truths. She also used sound logic. I respected that. Logic I could deal with.

When she told me that this wasn't the last time I'd be faced with prejudice against my heritage, I nodded in agreement. Hopefully, next time, knowing what I know now, I'll be able to handle it better.

We sat for a moment more, while I tried to gather up my courage. I was in a mess and I knew there was no way I could fix this problem on my own. I needed her help.

_What if she says no? Can I handle her rejecting me again? Especially since I feel so close to her right now..._

My fears didn't stop me. They couldn't. I had to know.

"I need another favor."

"Sure."

_Ha! She says 'sure' now, but she has NO idea what I need..._

Deciding it would be easier to show her, rather than explain, I took her hand and led the way to my ruined masterpiece.

"Oh."

_See. I told you this was big._

To my surprise, and internal delight, she simply took a deep breath and picked up the paint brush. "We can fix this", she assured me, "but it will take awhile." Might as well get started.

We plunged right in. It was surprisingly enjoyable, having her paint with me. I couldn't help but wonder what my life would've been like had I grown up with her as my mom. Painting together. Learning about our heritage together. How different...

I once again thought of Emmett. He would be thrilled to know how well Regina and I were getting along these days. I resolved once more to go and see him soon. I needed to apologize. In person. _I'm not giving up on us!_

As we finished the last few strokes, Regina and I stepped back, critiquing our work.

"Not bad." She seemed impressed by my design.

"Thanks." I thought about hugging her, but we weren't there yet. Words it was, then. "And thanks for your help. I wouldn't have been able to finished it without you."

She laughed. "Seems to me like you finished it just fine. The first time, anyway. Next time, when something upsets you, how about you come to me BEFORE destroying any more of your art, hmm?"

I had to laugh too. That was the first open invitation I'd ever gotten from her. "Sounds good. Maybe next time I come over you can teach more more about being Latina."

"Sure."

In bed that night I was too keyed up to sleep. Again. _At least this time it's a happy keyed up._ Grandma was leaving in the morning. _Thank goodness! _I had plans to make up with Emmett. Daphne and I were getting along the best we had in a long while (_I still couldn't believe she gave up the cameo for me!) _and best of all, I was finally, FINALLY building a relationship with Regina. I smiled in the darkness. For the first time in a long while, things were looking up!

**A/N: Thanks for all the encouragement to continue. Right now, I pretty much enjoy the way they show's heading so I think I'll stick with what I've got for now. We'll see how/ if things change later...**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Okay, this is a bit different, I know, but since we didn't Emmett in this episode, I had to kind of 'invent' what he might be thinking/ going through during all this with Bay. **

**So, please let me try and be clear. AFTER Las Dos Fridas, when they show the preview for next week (and yes, I realize those are often very misleading) and from the ABC family website, sneak peak area, I got a small glimpse of "Protect Me from What I Want"...I have NO idea if this is REALLY where the show's going, but I'm just guessing and playing with the characters. If you are the type of person who doesn't enjoy spoilers then please don't read until after you watch the episode. Any words/scenes I use that are repeated in the next episode are purely coincidental and I am only using those two, three second glimpses in order to have a vague idea, will not use exact wording...thanks so much for bearing with me! :-)**

Las Dos Fridas

EPOV:

God, I missed Bay!

Not seeing her these past few days was rough. I had been so happy and then all of a sudden everything just...went bad.

I knew that she needed space. And I was desperately trying to give it to her. Plus, while I knew she didn't mean what she said, I was still a bit hurt that she accused me of only being nice to try and get her into my bed. I would never do that. _Not to say I'd be disappointed if she wanted to make up in bed..._

Anyway.

Walking into our kitchen, I opened the fridge, hoping to find something to eat. My stomach was growling uncomfortably.

No food. Only a package of bologna and a few condiments. _Damn! _But there was another note. Third day in a row. I quickly scanned it.

**E,**

**O and I went out to dinner. Make sandwich for yourself. **

**Love,**

**Dad**

**-and tell your mom I feed you!**

I sighed. Looks like bologna is was. Again. I was getting damn sick of bologna. I was also getting damn sick of being the messenger between my parents. _I'm supposed to be the kid in this relationship, yet they can't even have a civil conversation without involving me...sheesh! _

Mom wasn't over me choosing to move in with dad. To be honest, it wasn't as great as I once imagined it would be. Sure, I enjoyed the no rules, no bedtime, letting me skip school part of the deal. I loved the fact that Dad and Olivia BOTH were on my case to make up with Bay and have her back over. Dad knew how upset I was when she left last time and Olivia's even offered to call and talk to her. Try and smooth things over. _Like I need her help! Geez, I'm not a child anymore! _

But,despite all that, I did miss mom's house sometimes. Mostly I missed the food. And the company. I'd be all over Dad and Olivia going off every night if Bay were here, but right now I was by myself and it was kinda lonely. Too lonely.

My hand skimmed the surface of my phone for the thousandth time in the past few days. _Bay. _

I was truly torn. I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to push too hard and have her flee, but if I did nothing then we'd NEVER get anywhere. _Not to mention I MISS her! _

Knowing Bay, she had gone home, relived every word of our disagreement (I can't even call it a fight!) and had blamed herself and worried over my reaction ever since.

I wasn't mad at her. I knew from the start that I was falling in love with a fierce, independent thinking, hot headed girl. _Falling in love. Huh._

I haven't told her. I was thinking about telling her the night she was to stay over. I had it all planned out. We'd be snuggling in my bed, I'd be holding her closer and would whisper to her how very much I loved her. Then, overcome by gratitude and her own feelings of love, she'd beg me to make love to her for hours on end. _It would've been perfect. Sigh..._

Except for the fact that I still wasn't comfortable talking in front of others. Bay assured me she didn't care, and I'd spoken to her before. But something about it just felt...wrong. It wasn't me.

But I wasn't giving up. This was too important to me. To us. Bay was trying so hard to learn sign for me. I wanted to show her that this wasn't a one-sided relationship. I was willing to meet her halfway. I also planned on spending more time at her house with her family. It wasn't until Olivia (_ironic, huh?) _pointed it out that I noticed ; Almost all our 'hanging out' was done at my house. I knew it wasn't her enjoying my dad because she hung out a lot at mom's house too.

I had only had the barest of conversations with her parents. Of course, a lot of that was due to their minimal signing skills. Still, I couldn't help but feel sometimes that Bay kept a distance there. _Is she embarrassed by me? Does she want to keep some distance between me and her family because this is just a casual thing to her?_

No! I didn't believe that. I wouldn't. Bay had proved time and again that she cared for me. That our relationship was important to her.

_Maybe she's still harboring some feelings for Ty..._

And that right there was why I hadn't told her.

_Coward._

I knew I should tell her. Bay was surprisingly sensitive and very observant. She's no doubt noticed that we haven't taken that step. _Damn! I should tell her...but what if she's not ready? What if she doesn't love me? What if..._

All this heavy thinking was making my head hurt. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know where to go from here, and I didn't know if I was ready to admit my feelings to her. The one thing I did know is that I wasn't willing to give her space any longer. Tomorrow, first thing, I was going to go see her. This separation had to end!

I slept better that night than I had in days. No worries about mom and dad fighting over me. No feelings of loneliness and regret. I simply dreamed of once again being with my Bay. _My Bay..._I drifted off to sleep with a smile on my face. _Tomorrow..._


End file.
